Updated: May 10
One of the most common proverbs, we learnt in our early developmental years. At a stage of life which was as innocent as it could get. We had tons of friends. Building friends, colony friends, class friends, batch friends, junior friends, senior friends and what not ! That was our big world with no signs of mean behaviour. No diplomatic conduct, whatsoever. Of course there were fights, even brawls. There were a lot of ‘ Mummy ko bata dungi’ and ‘Papa ko bata dunga’ moments. But we’d forget about these fights within hours or merely a few minutes. These fights were settled over a bar of chocolate or an ice cream (whatever we could afford from the pocket money)
Alas, we grew up. (whether we liked it or not) We grew up and so did our egos! The fights that could be resolved with a simple ice cream just got difficult with time. Gradually there was an uncomfortable silence and a loss of words. We changed and so did they!
But amidst all this we miss the person we used to be. There exists a different version of ourselves with different people we meet at different phases of our lives ( I know I have used ‘different’ thrice in that sentence, you Grammar Nazis !)
As we grow older, some (or a lot) of our friendships are left behind. Reasons could be many. There is a possibility ‘you’ evolved. You changed as a person. The version that existed earlier with those friends may not exist anymore. Growth is a way of life. But that doesn’t mean we forget who we are or were. Many times, our friends are that reality check, who point out when we go wrong. It is utmost important to have friends who are honest with you and are unafraid to lash out at you when you go wrong. But that does not mean they have the right to constantly criticize either. The friend who constantly criticizes you is definitely not a good friend !
How many of us really feel that we have friends who genuinely feel happy for us? Those who celebrate us and our achievements ? As we grow older, our circle grows smaller. Because we understand who our true friends are. Who care enough to stop by to check up on us. Those who understand just by the way we respond, that there’s something upsetting us or making us feel uncomfortable. Similarly, they anticipate our big moments. Who are as excited for us as our family ( sometimes even more than the family), when we achieve something. In fact they turn into our family.
They say social media is a curse. Its constant presence in our lives has ruined things for our generation. However, I see it as a boon. It brings so many people closer. There are many whom we do not know personally, who share our happiness! On the contrary, some ‘friends’ who wouldn't even acknowledge our joy and happy moments.
What is the point of this post ? It's just a reminder to cherish your friends who are there for you. Friends, who stand by you not only in happiness but also in your sadness. Friends, who have your back when you are at your weakest.
After all, a friend in need is a friend in deed !